Miles Witt Boyer Photographic Collective

The ideal situation would be to have a friend who is also a preacher or pastor, but we can’t all be so lucky. Asking a friend to officiate your ceremony can add a lovely, personal touch to your day - but it can also be a recipe for disaster.

Pros:

  • This is an extraordinarily special day in your life and you want to share it with the ones you love. Having a friend officiate puts care and love into every part of the ceremony. Your vows are already special because you’re taking them with the man who will soon be your husband. How much more special will they be with another friend by your side?

  • It personalizes the ceremony. There’s no need to have a stranger declare you man and wife. You can have an old friend with you every step of the way. And you can trust them to stick to the script out of love for you.

  • It’s easy for your friend to get ordained. There are a ton of websites and interfaith churches where he can become certified to perform your wedding.

  • It’s cheap. You won’t spend money paying a stranger to deliver your ceremony.

Cons:

  • This much pressure can ruin a relationship. Your friend, while a great person, probably hasn’t done this before. He won’t be able to help with wedding planning, and he might be nervous about performing this role. Be very clear about what you expect from him during the ceremony.

  • If you pick the wrong person, your wedding could get derailed. If you ask a friend to officiate, pick someone who will show up on time and won’t try to ad-lib the wedding script. The wedding needs to be about the bride and groom, not the officiant.

  • Even though it’s easy to find a website that says it will ordain you, not every website is seen as legitimate by every state. If you’re getting married here in Arkansas, do your research to make sure your friend can legitimately marry you to the man of your dreams.

  • Even if the wedding goes well, you might still end up with a problem. After the ceremony, the officiant has to send in your marriage license. You don’t want to get back from your honeymoon and find out you’re not actually married.